Vulnerability and Seeking Peace

The more I read in the news about different situations overseas and now this tragedy with Virginia Tech right in our backyard, I really feel the need to pause for a moment and just take in what a gift life really is. In spite of endless rainy weather, stressful group work, pointless assignments or any other reasons I would rather just stay curled up in bed and sleep through the day, I am really reminded of what a gift it is to have today- to be able to breathe and move and think and act freely. I can't find the original email I read, but I leave you with this reflection since it has the same idea.

To be Thankful For......
.....the mess to clean after a party because it means I have been surrounded by friends.....the taxes I pay because it means that I'm employed.....the clothes that fit a little too snug because it means I have enough to eat.....a lawn that needs mowing, windows that need cleaning and gutters that need fixing because it means I have a home.....all the complaining I hear about our government because it means we have freedom of speech......the spot I find at the far end of the parking lot because it means I am capable of walking.....my huge heating bill because it means I am warm......the lady behind me in church who sings off key because it means that I can hear.....the piles of laundry and ironing because it means I have clothes to wear......weariness and aching muscles at the end of the day because it means I have been able to have an active day.....the alarm that goes off in the early morning hours because it means that I'm alive...

Trying Tofu

I know it must seem like I am losing my source of profound things to talk about if I am now going to tell you about how I tried Tofu for the first time tonight, but just stick with me here. Recently, since being diagnosed with hypothyroidism, I have been trying to be more concientious about what I eat and what I do with my body. Though I have to say that there are times when I haven't done such a great job, I have pretty much given up coffee and I am trying to do regular exercise and eat more vegetables. It is incredible to me how these very small things, starting with not drinking as much coffee, have helped me to completely change my own image of myself.

I have started to think of myself as a healthy person for the first time since I stopped playing soccer in high school. And deciding to try one little thing at a time has made it fairly manageable. But the thing is that I had to try things that I thought I wouldn't like to find out that I actually did. Yoga, for example, was always an exercise I had a very strange image of. I thought you had to balance a lot and twist your body in crazy ways. I never thought I would be able to do it, much less like it. Come to find out it is challenging, strength building, and yet very relaxing at the same time. Now, I actually desire to stretch my body after sitting for long periods of time. Kickboxing is still a big stretch for me but I'm proud of myself just for going and trying. I can't always keep up, I'm not coordinated enough to do all the kicks and different moves, but still, I feel proud of myself just for doing something active with my body. And the exercise makes me want to take care of myself with what I eat too.

So, today, after doing Yoga, an exercise I never thought I would enjoy, I tried Tofu for the first time, a food I never thought I would enjoy and low and behold, it actually isn't too bad. I just discovered a new great source of protein to add to my diet. Ever since studying abroad, I learn over and over the ways that trying things I never did before can change my whole perspective on the world, or, in this case, on myself. And I also strive to remember the importance of taking care of myself in this life and being the kind of person I really want to be, even if it takes a little more effort. My mom used to have this quote hanging up on the fridge from a popular song:

"This is your life. Are you who you want to be?"

It helps to reflect on that every once in awhile and remember that it's never too late to change and become more of who we really are...